Aj, 31

I know how awful and difficult a choice it is whether or not to file a report. I filed a report on the last person to sexually assault me, but I knew there was nothing they could do. Like you, I wanted it on record in case he hurt someone else. Once they assigned the case to a detective, I went to the station again and did a pretense call to see if I could get him to admit what he did while being recorded, and also tell him to leave me alone forever (he didn’t do either of those things). That experience suuuuuuucked. I also went through hell trying to get a restraining order against him. I forget what I ended up with, a level or two below a restraining order. But I took a small amount of comfort in it.
The process sucks, period. I’m sorry he did that to you. In a better world, we would be able to report in a way that makes us feel safe and protected. That should be standard. It’s horrible to have to make ourselves vulnerable when we already feel violated and traumatized.

 I literally just went out with him and it was the WORST date. He was very pushy about having it as his place which I normally don’t do but decided to because he made it sound like we would be on the couch watching a movie. When I got there he said we couldn’t hang out in the living room because he was avoiding his roommate. His room was a MESS and he kept saying how we could just chill out on the bed and watch a show. I refused to even sit on his bed and he could tell how uncomfortable I was so he finally agreed to go somewhere else and just talk. Still not a great date and it was so uncomfortable. After reading what your friend went through I am so glad I trusted my gut and got out of there. Please report him!!!