William (David), 35

Sup, ex-ex-girlfriend here. Definitely can confirm all the behaviour listed by Mary. Lots of emotional and verbal abuse and manipulation. LOTS of gaslighting, projecting, and a complete inability to deal with you establishing/defending a boundary or even just expressing a FEELING or OPINION he doesn’t agree with. Flips out at relatively minor mistakes. Will weaponize therapeutic lingo to abuse you and manipulate you into thinking you’re the bad guy. No one in my life liked him, and it wasn’t because of what I said about him but rather because of what they witnessed. Blew up my phone while I was busy at work and couldn’t respond because I had five children under my care alone. Will get very mad if you don’t listen to/remember everything he says but also WILL NOT STFU no matter how mentally exhausted and incapable of listening you are. Would effectively coerce and guilt trip me into having sex when I didn’t want to even after hearing about my past sexual assault the one time I froze up and broke down (because “what about my needs and feelings about being rejected”) Would NOT allow me to take space in the bathroom or leave the apartment to cool down during a fight (because “you walking away triggers ME and why is you being triggered more important than me being triggered”). The one time I did he threatened to throw out all my things if I didn’t pick them up immediately at 3am. Any violence on his part was dismissed because of the one time I made a severely half-assed attempt at punching him in the face earlier in the relationship (I didn’t actually, would have if my heart was actually in it but it clearly wasn’t). We were seeing each other for a year and 3.5 months, living together for 10 months of that. In that time he: -pushed me into the bathroom wall -pushed me over the bathtub, I hit my head and back, it was bad -slapped me across the face to make a point when I said that self-defence law in Canada kicks in when you come at me in a threatening way rather than with the first hit and because I was gesturing with my hands then “there, you were coming at me” -one particularly violent incident where he repeatedly strangled me to the point where I saw stars and genuinely feared for my life. Walked away from that night bleeding from the nose, lip, ear, and scalp, with a chunk of hair ripped out, gouge and scratch marks all over my throat, later bruising around my mouth and chin and neck and burst blood vessels around my eyes from the pressure/oxygen deprivation. -might be an incident or two I’m forgetting but there was a bunch of super fucked but not exactly “violent” stuff as well All this happened about a year before he was with Mary. The ex he dated about three years before me had experienced much of the same stuff over the course of 11 years, including the physical violence. THESE ARE NOT ISOLATED INCIDENTS. THIS IS A PATTERN THAT HAS BEEN ONGOING SINCE HE WAS A TEENAGER. No matter how much he says he has grown and changed, HE HASN’T. I PROMISE. I genuinely don’t think he’s capable of it. He started therapy while we were together and apparently in the 1.5+ years since then, he hasn’t changed, so don’t buy that “I’m working on it and have grown a lot” crap, like I did. After endless patience and compassion on my part and MULTIPLE women leaving him by making secret escape plans in which we took our belongings in a pre-planned rush, he hasn’t learned. Sorry y’all, but I’m still real fuckin mad about this. And I hope that NEVER changes so I never let myself go through anything even remotely similar again.

Walking red flag. IG profile bio says enough. he/him/his Everyones’ favourite mess